Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Things I will Bring into the New year

No more painted faces, no more sugar coated words. I hate sugar.
I like raw.

No more indirect comments.
I'm bold.
I like this.

No more ignoring my mistakes.
I like my mistakes. They're mine. I own them. They are powerful!
No more bullshit covered phone calls. I prefer just not to answer.

More laughter.

Why hold back?

More hugs.
They're worth ever squeeze.

More seeds to plant.

I like flowers, and I get great satisfaction watching them grow in my world.

More photos, less worrying about the light. Just DO IT!

Today isn't the first day of a new beginning.

Every day is the first day of the beginning.

You can't end something you never started.

will get you everywhere,.
More doing, less talking.
More action, less thinking.
Procrastination means not doing.

Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Last Minnesota Blizzard of 2008

If you haven't experienced the Blizzards, the one inch or more of white fluffy stuff per hour, then you probably haven't been to MinneSNOWta!
I know when the west coast gets this, they shut down. Drivers are restricted, warnings go out like red lights NOT to drive.
Here we go...this is Winter here in Minnesota! Canada, Michigan, Wisconsin, Alaska, Iowa....we're kind of used to this...
I won't drive in it. Don't be calling me if you drive into the ditch! You want to take that chance, you better have blankets and water, food and BOOTS packed with you, because you might have a long walk home! That is, IF you can walk home!
Can't tell you how many stories we hear on the news where someone 'thought' they could walk home, only to be blown off the highway by another driver who dared drive in it...or even worse, you die in your own back yard trying to find the front door during a white out....those are horrible!

2009 we're gonna bring it on with another 4-6 inches of snow today, and hopefully then...we are done.

The best thing though, is the Winter Thunderstorms. They're rare and they are beautious to see the sky light up behind big fat white fluffy flakes, to hear the th under and no rain falling...just the quiet silence of the flakey stuff falling from our Minnesota sky!

Peace to all and the BEST To you in 2009.
Bring in your Best Learned Lessons of 2008, into the New Year with you. And if you don't think you've made any mistakes, I bet your friends will tell you otherwise! (you can always learn from theirs too, because you know damn well when you make a mistake they are all saying "THANK GOD THAT WASN'T ME!"
More to come

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Happiness is Something To Look Forward To!

I'm not big on Christmas. I think it was more fun as a kid when I believed in Santa Clause, the Tooth faery, the Easter Bunny and all that other stuff.
Most of it is Media Hype to me, a bunch of blah blah.....I guess I see the whole "Holiday" thing, the same way I would see any other day. Go out of your way to make someone smile.
Always be thankful. Always be Grateful even when you convince yourself there is nothing to be grateful for...there is...there always is.
I once heard...
"Happiness is something to look forward to."
Reading that was like swallowing the universal secret...and Never have I forgotten that.
Every day I wake up, and the first thing my mind automatically does is grab onto what makes me happy. Could be the beautiful man next to me in the morning, could be a new song I'm working on, a new experiment artsy photograph thingie, or a new recipe I want to try out -like pickle recipes--droooooool----
And the Holidays
are hard for many people, difficult...especially when the Economy is dumping all over like it is.
But once ya quit stressin about all the media hype, it's a bout one thing "Love"...and seriously,
we should be thinking about that every day
not on Christmas.
Whether you believe the Jewish Holiday, the Christian, or just simply believe....or if you are just celebrating life and love....That's all that matters...
and this is something we should do every day...Wake up and do one happy.
So no matter what you believe
or not believe
it's Certainly Not my place to judge, and I really wouldn't care to anyway....Just have a wonderful Life...and bring in the new year the way you'll bring in every day for the rest of your life
....Just looking forward to anything....

Thursday, December 18, 2008

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Feeling Gratitude

I think life moves in funny directions sometimes. It's quirky, it jumps and quivers unexpectedly, at unexpected moments...keeps ya on your toes.
As I paint, or play's like other peoples "Bathroom moments" where you claim to have so much time to think and be alone, undisturbed. This is what happens when I am 'in the moment' while doing something that soothes me in every way. My mind drifted to those moments everyone has ..when you KNOW something. Some people when asked "When did you realize you wanted to be a teacher?"
and the person always jumps in with something like "Well, when I was 3 I would Line up allllll my stuffed animals and dolls and have a 'school' session'. Or the Musician who knew when they started strumming on grandpas guitar at age 6, and on and on.
I've been fortunate in the sense, that my family tree is the one that looks like it's covered in melted crayons of every color, lots of artists, musicians, writers...creative souls in my family tree. So I guess it only makes sense that I 'swing in many directions'...for lack of better phrasing, haaa.
When I was very young I wrote little books. Stapled them together, put my name on the cover and of course had to write "ABOUT THE AUTHOR" sections. I would paste a photo of me, usually from my 'school photo', and make a little frame around it, and write something about myself... like
.......I started writing when I was 7, and I'm about to turn 12. I have had some experiences with..Blah blah blah!
So I guess there is one part of me that can say...OH I"VE ALWAYS KNOWN I"M A WRITER etc....

Like most kids, I drew...don't we all? But I took it a step further and as I began nearing Graduation, I got dEEp into my art, entered contests, did incredible detailed drawings, faces, details, shadows...things I can hardly imagine today, that I did then...I would like to get back into that!

Painting is new to me. I was always drawing in pencil or ink. On napkins, backs of envelopes, folders, walls, oh absolutely ANYWHERE I found a blank space.
Somehow there is a need to create in me.
It starts out kinda slow and heavy, it has a voice, it has a color and shape and it just breeds itself...multiplying over time, a few hours, a few days, a year....and then...something comes out.
A song. A painting. A story....and I've always done this. I never thought about, NEVER thought about exposing these things. These things I kept to myself. For one reason, they healed ME.
I wasn't the type to approach anyone with a drawing. I didn't show anyone my songs. I sang them for myself, I didn't want an audience.
Mostly I wrote though. I filled empty book upon empty book with poetry, lyrics, little stories, doodles and sketches. This is why i LOVE making the Blank Hand Painted Sketch Journals, because when I was a kid, had I seen an empty book with lots of white pages, and a cover that I could 'connect with' OOOO I would have bought that in a heartbeat.

When I was hanging out in Second Life (TM) with Cylindrian...she commented on a lampshade texture I had used. 'OMG Where Did You Get This Texture?" I told her it was from a drawing I did, took a photo of it and used it as a texture for a lampshade in SL. So I showed her the whole drawing, and she pretty much told me how much she liked it and why am I not 'showing' anyone my art?
Answer was simple to me then.
I never defined myself as an artist, or a musician, or a writer, until someone else saw it.
It's kinda like....Do you exist if no one EVER sees you? Well, yes you do, but not one has ever seen you, heard of you, contacted you, possible never new you....
If you do a painting and no one ever sees heals only you.
And that is what the whole purpose was behind everything I heal my self, to calm myself, to paint, to draw, to write, to perform, takes me to my own place, a place I can feel, let go, heal....
But Sharing it...well who would think? haaaa
and it is the greatest Pleasure EVER, to be able to express something, to others. To have a 'relationship' with those that listen....and to your own spirit.
Because if No one listened.
If no one looked.
If no one read.
I will...and it will heal me.
But since people do listen, read, and look...and's the blessing of it all, the biggest gift of all. It's that simple.
And I keep saying it to people...That Thing That YOU WAN T TO Do, you need to do it. The 'gift' you were born with, the sense that you have to paint something, have to create something, have to step out of the box and take a risk and start your own business, let people Hear your voice, let people Read What you write.

There are two ways to die....
Never doing what you thought you could have, never trying to write that childrens story, never opening up that cafe, never crossing the sea to see a different country,staying where we don't belong and not going where we do belong......that is one way. succeed, because you Did it, or died Trying :)

Friday, December 5, 2008

Behind the Scenes....

Noooooo, not going to let this Blog go to the wayside and Rot. I promised myself I would commit to writing in it 'about' once a week, and WOW I think I have slacked off a bit.
The hands of life has twisted its fingers all through my hair, and yanked me into some other cosmic realm in the Universe, been there?
Another Twitter Artist, WilddogStudio gave me a link once to view this amazing "Steampunk Style Ring' and I fell in love with it. The site was amazing About a week later my Soul Sistah Cylindrian Rutabaga aka Grace, told me about this site that I should ABSOLUTELY put my art on...."ETSY.COM"...well that got my seed growing, so I did...for the next week I messed around with the site, got a little familiar with it,
and planted several paintings, sketch book covers that I layered in Canvas and textured with various paints and colors....and LO n BEHOLD
I made some sales.
Surprised myself....I had no doubt that some might like what I do, and many would not.
But I never "expected' anything.
So far I'vemade 4 sales on that website and 4 others off the website.

I also released my CD This week "CERTAIN KIND OF MAD" and had a small pre release party at my LIVING ROOM #13 in SL, and an official 'launch' today at TRAX, thanks to Bones Writer for hooking me up with the CD Vendor etc!

Before that it was the CRAZY thanksgiving Holiday. My WHOLE Family came, including two gorgeous nephews who I absolutely ADORE, one who is in deep awe of my Washburn 6 String, he is 4 and he watches every m ove I make on that guitar
then imitates it...and he is absolutely 100% rockin into it!

I'm exhausted. I have hardly slept in the past few days. I take what Sleep I can get, but I think I have pushed myself a bit far, and now I really need to just kinda climb into my cacoon of NOTHINGNESS. However I am being tugged at the hair again
and I can again..feel myself heading towards another streak of madness.
I have no idea what will become of this one, perhaps nothing.
Right now, I can feel the weather of the soul, changing,
the creativity rising and falling.
Everytime I close my eyes I'm seeing vivid and brilliant colors and shapes dancing behind them.
It's a hell of a trip, but in the end
it's usually worth it.

BIG THING all of you who have supported me, bought the CD, sent me encouraging messages, called me just to say hi and see how the world is spinning. All of you who are such Awesome Supporters of my music, my art, my many attempts at something..somewhat SANE, haaa!

Family is family....IS family.
Thanks :)

Meanwhile, back to letting the energy out of me, and into the Universe, because keeping it inside.....well it can make one sick...better to let it out!

Monday, December 1, 2008

The New Writing/Sketch Books

Something I've always found some peace of mind in, is art...and challenging myself to do things that are different, risking the 'ruin of a painting' in order to discover something Newer on the surface.
This book started out quite different, with the outline of a face, looking from behind rusted lines.
I had sprayed some protective spray on the surface of what I had done, and wanted to touch up one more thing, so I placed the small canvas I use to create some texture, onto the book...
forgetting for a moment that there was a light spray still drying.
So the small canvas stuck like it was attached to Super Glue...when it finally released itself from the cover, there were small tears and little rips, and to tell you the truth, I LIKED how it looked....

I let the book sit a few days before attempting anything else, then finally I ripped up some canvas into strips and squares and planted them square on the book,
molding them together to give the whole front cover of the book, a more rugged style look.

When I finish any painting, I look at it and ask myself
IF I WERE in some small cafe, or a book store and saw this...would I buy it?
If the answer is no, the book gets either revamped or tossed aside. If I say yes, well...then you see this!
I have a shop on ETSY.COM under the name Suzen JueL...Title of this Blog will have a link to it..
I put a lot of my spare time into creating...
or more like it finds me and takes hold of me to do something....
and whatever comes out, is the gift....and like I just mentioned....sometimes I like it, sometimes I do not, sometimes I would buy it (and don't even want to sell it) and sometimes I think..DEAR GAWD WHAT HAVE YOU DONE!

I hope you enjoy the different flavors, textures and tones of this work, as I do.
Much Peace!
Now go check out the site, and peek around at all the other artists on it as well!

Self Portrait

Self Portrait
This is Not a Drawing